When It Hurts More Than It Should

Understanding the wounds beneath your reactions and how to bring them to Jesus for healing

Have you ever had a moment that shouldn’t have hurt that much… but it did?

Something small someone didn’t respond, didn’t acknowledge you, didn’t say hello and suddenly your heart feels heavy, your thoughts start racing, and before you know it, you’re carrying emotions that feel far bigger than the moment itself.

And you sit there wondering… Why did that affect me so deeply?

If you’ve ever felt that way, you’re not alone. And you’re not “too sensitive” or overreacting.

Sometimes what we’re feeling in the moment isn’t just about the moment. Sometimes it’s touching something deeper—something tender, something unhealed.

And the beautiful part is this: 

Jesus doesn’t turn away from those places.

He meets you right there… in the middle of it.

Sometimes it feels like something inside of us has been pierced like we’re bleeding internally, even though no one can see it. And what starts as one moment,  somehow spreads. It reaches into other areas of our lives. It affects how we think, how we feel, and how we respond to people.

I remember when I used to teach leadership classes to students, I would start with a simple exercise.

I’d ask them to think about someone in their family who annoyed them—so much so that all that person had to do was walk into the room and say “hello,” and it would instantly trigger frustration or anger.

Then I would ask them: 

“What are you feeling in your body right now?”

Tense shoulders… tight chest… irritation… anxiety…

And the point of the exercise was this:

 Our emotions begin in our thoughts and together they determine how we will act.  

It starts with what we believe, what we perceive, and what we tell ourselves about a situation. And those thoughts don’t just stay in our minds—they affect our bodies, our reactions, and our relationships. 

So what do we do with these big emotions?

What do we do when something small happens like someone walking past us without saying hello and suddenly our minds take off?

We start thinking:

 “They must be mad at me.” 

“What did I do wrong?” 

“How could they ignore me like that?”

Or maybe we go the other direction: 

“They don’t care about me.” 

“I thought we were friends…” 

“Why would they hurt me like this?”

And before we know it, our minds have created an entire story full of worst-case scenarios and not one of them is good. 

Scripture gently reminds us:

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” — Philippians 4:8

Because the truth is...

our minds will always try to fill in the gaps. 

But not every thought we think is true.

And if we’re not careful, we will start living and responding from thoughts that were never rooted in truth to begin with.

Why do we do that?

Most of the time it’s because there’s already a wound there.

Something unhealed. Something we may not even be aware of. And when something brushes against that place, even lightly it reacts like it’s been deeply injured.

And here’s the hard part:

 If we stay in those thoughts, we begin to respond not from truth but from what our minds and our emotions have created.

And that’s where things start to fall apart.

Because when we don’t respond from truth, we can end up hurting ourselves and others.

I’m not sharing this from theory. I’ve lived it.

Recently, I went through something that felt like someone had hurt me deeply like I had been stabbed in the heart emotionally.

I could actually picture it.

It was like I could see this wound inside of me bleeding. And I was honestly surprised by how strong my reaction was.

And my mind? It ran.

“They don’t love me.”

 “What did I do to deserve this?” 

“How could they hurt me like this?”

One thought after another… spiraling.

But in the middle of all of that, the Lord began to gently show me something.

First, there was a wound in me that hadn’t been healed.

And even though what happened was small, it touched that place and it started to bleed.

So instead of reacting outwardly, I needed to bring that wound to Him.

All of it.

The pain.

 The hurt. 

The thoughts.

And as I did, He began to give me peace.

Not because the situation had changed but because He was with me in it.

That peace became my anchor.

Every time my thoughts started drifting back into those worst-case scenarios, the Lord would gently pull me back:

“Bring it to Me again.”

And I did.

Again… and again… and again.

I didn’t act. 

I didn’t react. 

I stayed in His peace.

And I’ll be honest it was a back-and-forth process all day and night. When my thoughts wandered, it felt like the wound started bleeding again. When I brought it back to Him, His peace would cover it.

Almost 24 hours later, I finally spoke to the person.

And do you know what the outcome was?

None of what I imagined was true.

Not one thing.

They had simply been exhausted and had slept through everything.

That was it.

I shared honestly that I had felt hurt, and they immediately responded with kindness, love, and apology.

And in that moment, it became so clear.

This wasn’t about them. This was about something in me that needed healing.

Here’s what the Lord showed me through all of it:

• There can be wounds in our hearts we don’t even realize we’re carrying.

• When something touches that place, it can cause an outsized emotional reaction.

  
  

• Our thoughts can quickly take over and lead us away from truth.

  
  

• But every thought and every feeling can be brought to Him no matter how many times it takes.

And this part is so important:

Peace is the safest place to stay.

Even when you feel like you’re “bleeding” inside Jesus is faithful to meet you there.

So what do we do when this happens?

We bring it to Him.

Every thought. 

Every emotion. 

Every fear.

Again and again, if we have to.

We ask Him: 

“Lord, where is this coming from?”

 “Show me what needs healing.”

 “Help me respond in truth, not reaction.”

And when it’s time to speak to the person, we ask Him for the words so that we don’t cause harm to the relationship.

We also humble our hearts and ask for forgiveness.

Because those runaway thoughts? They’re not from Him.

And if we’re not careful, they can become seeds of anger, division, and even destruction.

We don’t want to give the enemy a foothold there.

Instead, we do this:

We invite Jesus into the wound. 

We allow Him to heal what’s been hidden. 

We let His peace guard our hearts and minds.

And we trust Him with the situation, with the relationship, and with our hearts.

You’re not alone in this:

Not in the feelings.

Not in the struggle.

Not in the healing.

He is with you right there in it.

And He is so faithful to bring peace even in the places that hurt the most. 

If this stirred something in your heart, don’t rush past it.

Take a few quiet moments with Jesus. Let Him show you what He wants to heal, what He wants to restore, and what is actually true.

And if you’d like a place to begin, I’ve created a space just for you, a gentle path to help you slow down, hear His voice, and begin walking with Him, one step at a time.

Wherever you are today stay with Him.

He is so faithful to meet you right in the middle of it.

With Him in love,

Maria